When I was a little over 30 years old I met a 25 year old woman in Georgia who had been married and divorced 5 times. She was working as a waitress in a truck stop and I was trying to get her to let me spend the night with her. "Oh no," she explained, "I'm a Christian. I only sleep with men I'm married to."
"So let me get this straight," I said. "You're 25 and you've been married 5 times, right?"
"That's true," she said.
"So in other words," I continued, "every time you get horny you get married."
She ran back into the kitchen crying and a great big guy with a cleaver in his hand told me I had to leave the truck stop right away.
He wouldn't even let me stay long enough to pay for my burger and fries.