May 12, 2017

Going Down On Fast Food

Undisclosed Location-- Just when you thought the Fast Food Wars couldn't get any worse, reporters embedded for Wackemall Network News reveal the seedy and shady backside of sexual torture that goes into every bite you put into your mouths.

Fast Food Bondage

"It's been a while," she said with a smile
as the Burger King came our way,
"I hope he isn't mad with me
for leaving him that way."

"Mrs. Winners," smiled the Burger King,
"I'm glad you're back in town.
Guards, arrest these traitors!
To the dungeons have them bound!"

And though we struggled best we could,
the fries, they pulled us down,
whipped us, beat us, had their way
and shoved us to the ground.

Shackled hard to onion rings,
they tried to make us talk
and when they fluffed her biscuits
Misses Winners only balked,

"I'll never talk, I'll never tell!
You'll never know who did it!"
But the Big Cheese only laughed,
"You'll be deep fried in a minute!"

Has there finally been a victor in the burger wars? Is this the end-- the last tasty gig for the Fast Food Delights? Do you think the band will get back together again? Wait, is that a hot juicy burrito dancing on my street? Later guys, I'm off to eat her tacos.