Jul 20, 2018


When my son was growing up I took him to spend the day with a couple of my friends who had sons the same age. One of my friends had a huge 4 wheel ATV that he used for hunting. My son and his son were experienced riders but the 3rd boy wasn't.

When the 3rd boy got on the ATV he kept stalling it out when trying to take off. Everyone was having a good time except for him. We kept telling him to give it more gas, not to worry, that he couldn't break the machine.

So taking us at our word he cranked the throttle wide open and dumped the clutch causing the ATV to wheel stand all the way across the yard and into the next door neighbor's brand new chain link fence that had been put up the day before.

100' of fence laid over flat on the ground and 3 very embarrassed dads standing there looking at it.

The boy was fine. We all made it clear it wasn't his fault, that we had been bad teachers. Then we split the repairs equally between the 3 of us.

Jul 17, 2018

Bungee Jumping Cantaloupes

 Don't believe me? Bungee jumping cantaloupes really are a thing. When grown on trellises, cantaloupes must be protected from falling to the ground by hanging in bags made of cloth, onion bags, panty hose, etc. The best part about growing your muskmelons this way is there is no guessing as to when they are perfectly ripe as ripe melons bungee when ready to eat.

 I spend some time this morning bagging cantaloupes. Unfortunately my photos were horrid so I searched the web and found better via The Red Dirt Garden.

Jul 16, 2018

The Legend Of Little Texas Pete

When I was a kid you literally had to beat those little bottles of Texas Pete Hot Sauce to get them to give up that hot, savory sauce. But like most families living here in the Piedmont of North Carolina, Texas Pete, made since 1929 by the TW Garner Food Company in nearby Winston-Salem, North Carolina, was the only brand of hot sauce to grace our Sunday table.

I remember beating and beating on the bottoms of those tiny Texas Pete bottles in order to get the sauce to flow. And then only getting a few drops.

According to urban legend at the time, sales of Texas Pete had fallen sharply and the Garner family was at their wits end trying to figure out what to do to increase sales. And while I don't if it is true, local urban legend has it that an expensive consultant was hired to tell them what they needed to do to increase sales.

Then one day the holes in the tops of the bottles got bigger and that special sauce poured right out. Just the way we always wanted it to do. The sauce was fine, they just needed bigger holes so folks would use more Texas Pete.

I can't attest to the truth of the urban legend but I do know the holes are bigger, Texas Pete flows free, and according to Wikipedia, "Texas Pete is the third best selling hot sauce in the United States as of 2004." Guess that makes it legendary even if the urban legend isn't true.

Jul 14, 2018

Time To Fix The System

They say the American political system is broken. Only a fool would disagree. They like to blame the problem on low voter turnout.

I tend to think that voting is how we got here. The people who didn't vote didn't put anyone in office. The people who did vote put the wrong people in office. How can you blame decisions made by voters on none voters? That would be like blaming your dog.

The willingness of voters to vote for candidates who do not meet the measure of what a candidate should be is the problem, Period, End of Story. Neither Clinton nor Trump met the measure of what was needed and yet they were the only choices the Partys gave us.

You can't blame that on those who stayed home.

Irresponsible? Hardly. But it is certainly a sign that the machine is broken.

And if you continue to operate any machine after it is broken you only do more damage to the machine.

Time to stop voting, shut down the machine and fix it.

Or you can wait until the machine is beyond repair.

Jul 13, 2018

Deadly Perceptions

We're not so different... But believing we are different can only lead us to harm one another.

Jul 12, 2018

Two Eagles Talking

"See that fish over there?"

"Which one?"

"The big brown one swimming across the river."

"Oh wow, if I were to catch that fish I wouldn't have to eat for a week."

"You can't have that fish."

"Why not?"

"It's illegal."

"It is? Why? How?"

"It's crossing the border illegally."

"What if I fly south of the border and catch it when it swims back across the border?"

"No law against that."

"Good, it's turning right now."

Photo via doc ellen of dreamingsongsphotos, Jordan Lake, North Carolina.

Get the best of Two Eagles Talking, fish, feathers and all, right here at Wackemall.com You know, at least until we get caught crossing the border.

Jul 10, 2018

Reason Asks

Hell On Earth

The Scriptures say the poor will always be among us.
So let them remain poor?
The Meek shall inherit the Earth
but whatever for?
For the Kingdom is Heaven--
the place we adore.
Why are the meek left here
to live like before?