Mar 27, 2017

The Circus Lives!

Links To Dreamland

Trapped in walls of sound,
the pachyderms arrive,
Green and red. they fill my head
Pacific trains survive.
A cat looks to the heavens
afraid of what lies deep
while lonely women await a kiss
and me, I'm off to sleep.

The Meek Shall Inherit Fast Food

Undisclosed location-- Embedded journalists for Wackemall Network News are beginning to see a different story unfold as the Fast Food Wars continue. That story is the story of those most effected by the war and least able to do anything about it.

Mister Bojangles Revisited
Mister Bojangles, he played his song for me;
played it with a spork,
then he danced the two step,
pawned his tambourine in York.

“Gotta Wanna Needa Gotta Hava,”
he sang his song for me,
climbed out of the dumpster
laughing, “Looks what I gots free!”

This edition of Wackemall Network News has been make possible by sporks and the billions of gallons of fossil fuels used to make them. And napkins. Lots of napkins. And trees. And electricity. And....

Mar 26, 2017

Things I Found On The Web Today: Part 17

"The rusty patched bumble bee gained federal protection Tuesday
after the Trump administration removed its hold on
listing the species as endangered."
Will the Secret Service protect them now?

A guide to writing, written.
like all guides to writing,
by a writer no one has ever heard of.

"Globally, dogs have caused about 10 extinctions and continue to threaten another 150 species. In the United States alone, some 78,000 dogs roam habitats close to urban and suburban development."
But dogs are man's best friend.

I found a bluebird
eating a ripe blue berry
on the rocks.
And I'm sure it's not real.

Victoria Beckham’s collaboration with Target
is being pushed on dozens of websites
to make it appear as if all the attention is viral.
It isn't.

And finally, I learned 21 Cool Internet Tricks to Revolutionize Your Browsing
and yet I was still bored enough to spend my time composing
Things I Found On The Web Today...

Some days, no matter how long the wheels turn, you still end up right back were you started.

History Of Wackemall: Part 64, Thomas Paine

In Part 53 of the History of Wackemall, we spoke of how the great American statesman, Thomas Paine wrote of Wackemall in his 1778 letter to British General Sir William Howe. But that wouldn't be the only reference to Wackemall Thomas Paine ever made. In 1780, Paine wrote:

"These are the times that try men's souls....

If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have wackemall."

Pointing out how important Wackemall was to Colonial America.

He would then go on to write:

"...Wackemall is not the purchase of a day, and it is no wonder that we should err at the first setting off."

As he worked to rally the forces of Western Pennsylvania to remain loyal and vigilant to the cause of American independence.

And finally Paine closed his letter by writing:

"Look on this picture and weep over it! and if there yet remains one thoughtless wretch who believes it not, let him suffer it without wackemall."

Too often history is written by the visitors and passers-by, telling only the parts they want you to know, or the tiny parts they heard. That's why we here at think it so important you read and study the entire History of Wackemall rather that remaining ignorant, dumb, stupid, and bored for the rest of your life.

Mar 25, 2017

If You Only Knew What I Know


With four eyes staring down on me
I reached to grab a gun
the white cliffs standing over me.
Finally, I thought, success!

The creature with 4 eyes is a Marpissa muscosa jumping spider native to England.  The poem is called a hyperlink poem-- click the links before the secrets are lost.

Two Eagles Talking

"You know, I hear a lot of them aren't very happy with that new President they elected."

"So what's new, they're never happy with the President-- not even the ones who voted for him"

"Well then why do they vote for him?"

"Because they're too dumb to know to fly away, I guess."

"Makes as much sense as anything else I've heard."

Get the best of Two Eagles Talking at... Who the hell am I kidding? If anyone wanted to read any more of these bird brained jokes I wouldn't have to work so hard to promote them.

Photo credit: Eagle Totem

Why The System Doesn't Work

The system was built only with the intention of forcing everyone to follow the hierarchy-- no logic required, no logic rewarded.
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